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Dragonball Z (I don't own it, btw!) Jokes.
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From the joke 'Mozart'
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It was a regular day at the cemetery. Cold. Dark. Raining. And the caretaker, Goku, was walking around, and patrolling it. The rain didn't bother him at all; he was used to the weather. He was also a very brave man, but the events that would soon take place would test his braveness.
Ok, done with the hook! Now, moving on, so, Goku was walking along through the cemetery, when he all of the sudden heard a strange sound coming from Mozart's grave. He looked all around, but there was nobody there. That's when he got spooked, and went off to go get the town priest, Gohan.
Gohan and Goku were now standing before the grave of the great composer, and they both heard the sound, but they couldn't figure out WHAT was making it!
So, they went back into town to get the all-knowing one, whose name was Trunks. The three of them were now at the cemetery, keeping a respectful distance away from the grave. Trunks, however, dared to venture toward it. He leaned down, and put his ear to it so that he could hear the sound better.
"Ahh!" he exclaimed, "I know what's going on! Gentlemen, there's no need to worry, none at all."
With that, Trunks got up and started walking away.
Goku and Gohan said, "Wait! Tell us what's going on first!"
Trunks turned around and said, "Oh, you should've said that you wanted to know."
Gohan and Goku created the sweatdrop that ate Miami, and toppled onto the floor.
"Is something the matter?" Trunks blinked, "Why did you fall down--is your stomach hurting you? Or would you like some Preparation H, perhaps?"
"We're fine,"Gohan said, standing up, "Just tell us what that sound is."
"It's all of Mozart's symphonies being played backwards." he took an umbrella out of his jacket pocket and opened it. "You know," he said, "I'd advise you never to open an umbrella indoors. Not only may it bring you bad luck, but its also a stupid thing to do--a waste of time and energy." she smiled briefly.
"..."Gohan said.
"And why is the grave doing that?!?!" Goku yelled, finally losing his patience.
Trunks raised an eyebrow at the two, "You mean you haven't figured it out yet?" he turned away again, leaving them with a simple answer: "My dear friends, Mozart is decomposing."
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From the joke 'Tracks'
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Trunks, Goten, and Videl had been on yet ANOTHER adventure to go find the dragonballs, and the radar landed them somewhere in the woods. While searching for the ball, they got lost, and couldn't find their way out. There was nothing but trees as far as the eye could see. Night was falling, and they were beginning to get worried. Eventually, they decided on just making camp.
"You know what?" Videl said, "I'm gonna go catch a deer."
The two young boys looked at her oddly.
But despite them, she ventured off into the woods to find a deer. An hour later, she came back with a deer slung over her shoulder.
"Wow!" Trunks said, running up to her, "How did you catch that thing???"
"Well.." she said, flopping it down on the floor, "I found the tracks, I followed the tracks, and....BAM! I found a deer!"
"Aaaww, cool!" Trunks smiled, "I'm gonna go catch one!"
And so the little boy headed off into the woods.
An hour later, he came back with a deer slung over his shoulder.
Goten, who hadn't been paying attention when Videl had explained things earlier, ran up to Trunks and said, "How did you do that. Trunks???"
"I did what she did," he nodded his head over to where Videl was sitting, "I found the tracks, I followed the tracks, and BAM! I found a deer!"
"Cool! I'm gonna do that too!" Goten grinned and hopped off into the dense shrubbery to find a deer.
Five hours later he came back with no deer. His hair was messed up, his clothes were ripped and torn, his face was dirty, the works.
Trunks rushed to his aid, "What happened, Goten?"
Goten's face faded into a frown, "I did EXACTLY what you said! I found the tracks, I followed the tracks, and BAM! I got hit by a train!!!!"
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Veggie with EDPT horse! bwuaha! From the blonde joke.
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There was a blonde that woke up one day, and decided to take horse lessons. She had had no previous experience with riding horses, but she knew that she'd do just fine.
So, she was on a horse, and everything was going fine. It was galloping at an even, steady rate. Then, all of the sudden, she started slipping out of her saddle. She tried to get the horse to stop, but it never did, it just kept going. She panicked and grabbed the reigns to pull herself up again, but it didn't work, and when she tried to latch onto the horse's mane, it was too slippery.
Eventually, she had slipped so far, that she was totally under the horse, and was at the mercy of its stampeding hooves.
That is...until Vegeta, the Wal-Mart employee came and unplugged it.
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